I am scared..
These past eight months have been so terrifying and upsetting, yet so fun and wonderful. But the same issues come up.. The other night he said to me, "Everytime we have this conversation, I loose feelings for you a little more..." I don't know how I will get past this... Every terrible argument is over this.. He knows I get upset, yet I feel like he doesn't respect this need of mine.. Things could be so much worse.. I could be so much worse..
I am so terrified now.. ever since he has said that..
I think so myself, at what point is he at now?,,, For an example of a scale from one to ten, it's like he started with ten, and I am so soo afraid he's at five or lower now..
This week, it's like, he doesn't even want to sleep with me anymore. I'm at one side of the bed, and he's all the way at the other.
I try to do things for him, but he shows no excitment or joy.
And tonight, he got mad at me for wanting to get closer... He rolled over, and supposedly fell asleep that very minuite.
He won't talk to me,... he won't answer me.. He's just ignoring me.. when I know for a fact that usually if I was making this much noise, he would wake up and complain..
I am soo afraid we're near our end. I don't want to let go.
Why is he not interested in me anymore?,,,,,
This was exactly what I was afraid of too...
Exactly why I kept pushing him away before our relationship started.
Yet he persisted on getting me.. Even when he already had me at heart..
I thought, if he's really persisting this hard.. He has to be worth it..
I thought, if he really does like me this much, I'm sure if I spoke up he would make an effort to make me feel better, make me feel special, make me feel like I was his one and only..
Sitting on the floor, crying.
Whenever I am feeling sad and lonely like this.. it feels as if he walks away.
When I need him like crazy to be by my side...
